March 17, 2014

the bar

Sometimes it's hard to know how high to set the bar for your children. You want to set it high enough so they have to stretch and grow to reach it... but not so high they give up in defeat. For me, this is much easier with my girls. It's pretty clear what they are capable of and what they need to work harder on. With my buddy, it's like some days he's almost there and other days he needs a step ladder to even get close.

I never know how hard to push him. I don't make a good motivational speaker. I have no competitive drive. Pushing does not come naturally to me. I also don't want our whole life to be focused on my buddy. I think what I need is a crystal ball that can show me different outcomes based on different choices.

My buddy just came home with a progress report. While I am used to seeing a long series of below grade level (except for Music and PE which he rocks), I was taken aback by many areas where his progress has declined. I know he has been refusing to do a lot of the work at school and they are working on some behavior modifications. Is his behavior impeding his learning? Is it to be expected for him to decline in some areas?

I could hire a behaviorist to come to our house and work on a program at home as well. I just need that crystal ball too see if it would really work in the long run. I know it would be a lot of work for me as well as time focused on my buddy and away from the girls. Would we all benefit? Do I have the energy to make it work? I seem to have more questions than answers.

We had one afternoon of warm weather... not enough to melt the snow but enough to give us all a little spring fever.

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