March 10, 2015

not so great

My buddy has had a series of not so great days at school. Not so great as in emails saying they had to physically restrain him because he was hurting himself and others around him. Not so great as in a call so he can talk to me on the phone and stop crying. Not so great as in when he finally calmed down after one restraint and they brought him his communication book so he could choose what he wanted to do, he pointed to the 'backpack' picture and said, "home."

I'm a nurturer by nature. These stories make me want to pick him up from school and snuggle him in my arms all afternoon. I'm better with a hug than with a "buck up buddy." I know that there have been a lot of changes at school plus the time change. It's all it takes to throw him off. He also sneezed a ton after school which usually indicates that he is getting sick. (Perfect timing because he's actually been healthy for 3 whole days.) Plus the moon is in retrograde and all those other excuses I use.

I don't know why he behaves the way he does. I assume it is extremely frustrating to lack the ability to communicate with those around you. Plus he just wants to do his own thing. Change is not his friend.

I asked one of his teachers today about the search for a new para. She said it was going slow because they are looking for the right person who they think can handle him. Then she said that unfortunately people talk and word has spread that my buddy isn't the easiest to deal with. Now, I appreciate that I am an easy person to talk to and she is being honest with me, but I did not need to hear that coming out of the mouth of a professional that works with my child.

I say at least daily how hard my buddy can be. But I don't want to hear his teacher say it. It's like making fun of your brother - fine when you do it, but as soon as the words come out of someone else's mouth, you beat them up with your Care Bears lunchbox.

Some days I marvel at just how far my buddy has come. There are so many things he can do and a level of maturity that I never thought he would reach. But other days it seems like he still has so far to go.

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