August 8, 2012


A couple of weeks ago I had a doctor's appointment.  She asked me if I had any help.  Well, no, except for when my mom is in town.  She asked if we had a babysitter.  Again, no.  I have people I can count on if I am in a pickle.  I have people who have offered to help that I have never taken them up on it.  And, yes, my marriage has survived the last 5 years without a date night. 

I have lots of reasons why I don't want to drop my kids off somewhere.  Monkey bear is a big help and fun to be around.  I know that leaving her with anyone (other than Daddy and Nana) stresses her out.  My buddy will gladly go where ever with whom ever.  But that whom ever better watch out. Very few people understand my buddy and are equip to handle his various behaviors as well as his never ending energy.  He has moments every day where he is very taxing and there are very few people I trust with him.  And, for now, I am the food wagon for rara.

I feel so lucky that I get to be a stay at home mom.  I was married for 10 years before we were financially sound enough for that to happen.  I truly enjoy spending time with all of my children.  Don't get me wrong - there are those days when you want to lock them in a closet and sit in front of the TV with a stiff drink and your feet up pretending you are single.  Then you have that moment where you just snuggle them and your heart grows even more.

The years of intense child care are short.  Already monkey bear will be off to full day kindergarten.  She will spend more time away from me than with me.  Maybe I sheltered her too much and should have sent her off to people's houses without me.  Before I blink again, she will be a teenager and want nothing to do with me.  I try my hardest to enjoy these years.  Sure I call my best friend every day to complain but that is just what we do.

 I have made it 5 years without help.  The big kids are in bed by 7:00 and some day the baby will join them.  Date night starts at 7:05... on the couch... dress code of pajamas.  Who needs a babysitter?

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